HIGH TIDE ON WHY PEOPLE HAVE BETTER SEX IN HOTELS.

Modern adult store High Tide landed into The Box at The StandardX, Melbourne earlier this year, bringing more than just beautifully designed objects along for the ride. Known for its thoughtful curation of sexual wellness, self-care and pleasure products, the brand is helping reshape conversations around intimacy through the lens of design, inclusivity and wellbeing.

The collaboration sparked a few overdue conversations around hospitality and intimacy, and why they’ve always belonged in the same room. We caught up with founder Paige Aubort to talk desire, design and why sexual wellness deserves a place alongside every other hospitality essential. 

Hotels are designed around human needs. Why do you think intimacy has historically been left out of the conversation? 

We live in a society that still feels incredibly uncomfortable talking about intimacy in any kind of open, normalised way. The irony is that intimacy has always been part of hospitality. People have been having sex, desiring, exploring and escaping in hotels since they first began taking in guests. It just hasn’t been openly acknowledged with the same care as sleep, food, lighting, bedding or design. That is what feels interesting now. Todays’ hotels have become very good at thinking about the whole person. How they sleep, eat, move through a space, how they feel when they arrive. Intimacy is part of that. It’s not separate from the human experience.

Why do you think people become more open, connected, or curious when they’re away from home? 

We exist in a very busy, very loud world that requires a lot from us. That often sees us following quite strict schedules.  To travel is to walk off the beaten path, to come into contact with sights, sounds, tastes and smells that we have not yet formed an opinion on. There is also the anonymity of being in a new city, which is a really sexy part of travel. You are slightly removed from the version of yourself that exists at home. You are not being looked at through the lens of your routine or your responsibilities. That can create a lot of freedom.  

As owners of a modern adult store, what do you think people are actually seeking when they walk through your doors? 

The people who walk through the doors at High Tide have often taken time out of their day to think about what the best version of themselves might look like. Is it someone who enjoys life more? Someone who seeks pleasure every day, not just when everything on their to-do list is done?  And then they start to see that exploration, whether with toys, lubricant, books or conversation, can be one way of moving towards that person.  

People are also seeking permission. They want to be in an environment where sex and pleasure are spoken about politely, professionally and casually. There is something very powerful about having someone speak to you about a sex toy with the same calmness and consideration they might use to talk about skincare or a beautiful object.  

And lastly, human beings are innately so curious. We designed High Tide so that every item can be picked up, touched and looked at. Nothing is hidden away.

Hospitality and sexual wellness seem like very different industries on the surface – where do you see the overlap?

 Both are about how people feel in an environment, and both are about care. As owners of a physical brick and mortar store, we see ourselves as being of service to the people who visit High Tide in the same way that we took care of people who came to our venues to eat and drink. A good hotel, a good restaurant, a good store, they all understand that people remember how they felt. They remember whether they felt considered. They remember whether they felt comfortable enough to ask the question they really wanted to ask. 

What role does the environment play in intimacy? 

I think people often assume intimacy happens because two people are attracted to each other at the same time. Case closed. But the environment plays such a huge role. When I think about intimacy, I think about light, I think about texture, I think about music.  All of these things can act as brakes or accelerators (thank you Emily Nagoski). And I think hotels like The StandardX understand this instinctively. They understand that design is not just about how something looks, but how it makes a person feel in their body. That is why intimacy belongs in the hospitality conversation. It is not just about putting a product in a room. It is about understanding that people are more likely to feel connected, open and present when the environment allows them to feel safe, unhurried and considered. 

Why do you think people often reconnect with themselves or their partners when they’re travelling? 

Because it creates distance from the parts of life that usually take up so much space. Even just being away from your laundry, your inbox, your kitchen bench covered in things you have not put away yet, can change how available you feel to yourself and to someone else. There is also the excitement of novelty. When you are experiencing something for the first time, you tend to be more present. That is where reconnection starts. In the feeling of having enough space to actually notice yourself again. To notice the person beside you. To remember that pleasure, intimacy and connection are not separate from life. They are part of what makes life feel full.